Definiteness is not about being apologetic. It is not about being forceful. It is about being clear and consistent. The problem often seen is that the rider does not feel confident enough to correct the horse when she herself feels she may be the cause of the problem. Eyes on the ground can help to check that you are sitting straight and so on. Often it is just that the lack of confidence results in a lack of definiteness and the horse just thinks it’s ok. The rider knows it isn’t and blames themself again.
“If only I was good enough everything would be ok” – oh I know that statement so well! The truth that practice makes permanent can bring fear to those lacking in self belief. The conclusion may be that it is better not to practice at all…
The greater the rider’s confidence, the more she acts positively. This means our horse is clearer about what we want and inspires him to trust us. Clarity of communication and confidence increases the willingness of our horse to work for us and this in turn improves the confidence of the rider. A powerful reinforcing loop. Wallowing in self-blame and pity changes nothing. Recognise that, and you’re on your way forward.
Figure 25 Vicious spiral of definiteness
Know you know
Once you know – remember that you know! If you revisit things you already know in the processing side of your brain you waste valuable processor time and become confused and limit yourself. Self belief is a tremendously powerful force.
One trainer used to say to me “I wish you’d ride like you drive”. At the time I didn’t really understand what he meant. Now I think that I do. I knew that I knew how to drive so I didn’t think about how to do it; it just happened naturally. Unlike a beginner driver …or indeed trying a new car (especially left hand drive!). The minute you start thinking about how to do it the flow stops. It becomes mechanical, jerky and not flowing.
Things to remember
The quality of our connection with our horse affects the quality of communication and vice versa.
Balance is the key topic of dialogue with our horse.
We must understand balance: the factors affecting it and how we can rebalance ourself and our horse.
To communicate we must have attention.
Listen; choose an exercise; assess impact (listen to horse’s response)
Reward a little with much; correct much with little.
Successful communication depends on knowing when to ask and how to ask.
Anger is self defeating.
Be committed and definite.
Be honest with yourself and your horse.